living my life my way
December 20, 2011 | View Comments | Posted by momo
enough of living odas life .. thinking what odas might think of , what odas tell you to do .. what oda want you to you .. what odas whatever expect you to do or to be … fo gods sake lemme be what i am .. accept me as i am else fuckkk offf !! i dont give a shit !! franklyy i’m tired of caring for people who dont care at all for me .. who don’t give a shit about me even if i die for them to prove how much i care for them .. i wonder how someone can be so ruthless and forgetful .. how she can’t see how much i am incomplete without her …how she cant see me when i’m right beside here waiting for her ..
i’ve waited so long now .. feels like its been ages .. i feel so lonely sometimes … feel like i should just stop … only if i could do that .. only if i could erase that part of my brain with your memory and completely get over you … so that next time i see you i dont even remember who you are and completely walk pass you without any feeling for you …
its strange .. i’ve tried everything and nothing seem to work .. my heart still feels cold and beats faster when i think of you even though i know its wrong and its gonna hurt me more .. this freaking hope is gonna get me killed i guess .. i dont know if i’m being too optimistic or what but i have that feeling that this can’t be the end … i mean how can this be ?? how can god be so cruel to me ?? or have i been that i deserve a life like this without her … 
reality …
December 12, 2011 | View Comments | Posted by momo
i know reality sucks .. many can’t face the reality … it was fun thought tonight … simi became famous idk why ?? . .. she’s so much of a famous personaloty i know today .. salay was last populat among my family .. eveone was asking about her .. malai ta baal k ,.. whow’s shee ? were’s she from ? is she singos ?? blw bnlw bla ? jpt /.. why are they even concerned … salahhh lathuwa haru ….
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The feeling of being broke
December 9, 2011 | View Comments | Posted by momo
There was a time when I used to spend so much money just going to expensive restaurants for breakfast, throwing parties, playing bowling, drinking beers, buying expensive stuffs … and now when I look at my wallet, I only have Rs. 20 and I have had that for a couple of days now .. what happened to me? what’s wrong with me? I dont wanna go anywhere these days .. i want to be alone .. 20 rs is enough for me for few hours with a cup of tea and 2 ciggies .. and whenever i am alone with an empty wallet, thousands of questions quarrel inside my head .. i can’t think straight .. i just keep quite and act normally. I am patience. It’s not that I ain’t doing nothing. I know myself. I’m not useless as most think of me as. I know i don’t have a job but i am not staying idle. I’m probably doing more than any of those office going people are doing. Just that I don’t have money right now and yes I feel sad at times coz I’m broke now … No i haven’t spend all in booze and stuffs only … I’ve helped a lot and i know that, I’ve made many people happy and I’m happy when i think of that .. but when i see my empty wallet, deep inside i’m sad …
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You…….
December 4, 2011 | View Comments | Posted by spaghetti
When i first met you, i would’ve punched myself if anybody told me i’d end up with you. When we got together, i had no idea i would’ve fallen so deeply in love with you. I had no idea that one day you would let it all go and walk out on me……
At that time, i had no idea why u’d even come to my life. i wished more than ever for me to go back time and make it so i would’ve never met you, never fallen in love with you, never gone through the pain of losin you….. Today i realize that you were sent to me.. to teach me so much aba myself and life. You believed in me more than anybody else would… you made me see that there was so much more that i could accomplish.. you taught me that one never stops learning and that i needed to do the same…. you guided me through the path that i wanted so much to walk on…
I couldn’t have gotten to where i am today, if not for you. You made me wanna become a better person.. an improvization of myself.. you’ve moulded me into everythin i am n i’ll keep tryin to get to such heights, wherein i’ll b able to meet you at the top…. all because of you………
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A Thousand Years – Christina Perri
December 1, 2011 | View Comments | Posted by momo
I heard this song a month ago then suddenly i forgot about it .. and all of a sudden yesterday a fren of mind suggested me to listen to this song and i searched the video in youtube and since then I’ve heard this a thousand time and I can listen to it for a thousand more … dont know why but i feel so happy when i’m listening to this song .. feels like i am in love again and i dont give a shit what happened in the past but this gave me kinda of a new life, the kinda energy that i will die waiting for youu … my heart still aches when i think of her, it still feels cold inside when i remember those moment i spent with her.. i so wish sometimes that i’d forget everything the next day when i wake up and god knows i’ve tried it harder than anything in this world .. or may be i didn’t give it my best shot …
Heartbeats fast
Colors and promises
How to be brave
How can I love when I’m afraid to fall
But watching you stand alone
All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow
One step closer
I have died everyday waiting for you
Darling don’t be afraid I have loved you
For a thousand years
I’ll love you for a thousand more
Time stands still
Beauty in all she is
I will be brave
I will not let anything take away
What’s standing in front of me
Every breath
Every hour has come to this
One step closer
I have died everyday waiting for you
Darling don’t be afraid I have loved you
For a thousand years
I’ll love you for a thousand more
few fun moments left in our lives
November 28, 2011 | View Comments | Posted by momo
It’s fun to get drunk sometimes; not always but sometime .. get drunk, attend classes, sleep in the first bench and give tests when you don’t have a clue what the question really is about … yesterday was kinda same .. few of we basketball playing guys went to kakani (name of the place is 35 kms to be exact) to have Trout .. it was really fun .. we had “kodo ko raksi” almost 3 full (we were only 4) and few oda stuffs and everyone was laughing like crazy … while returning I almost had an accident … but we didn’t cared coz we were “Good” lolz … I’m gonna to upload the pix of yesterday and few from today’s basketball right now in my facebook .. if you’re friends with me you can check them out here ^_^
Few of the pix are these 
Killin me softly??
November 23, 2011 | View Comments | Posted by spaghetti
I really really wish there was something I could do to control everything around me… from the way I feel to the way others make me feel. But sadly I can’t and it sucks that much more because I can just about see what’s happening and cant’ freakin do nothing aba it.. its like a cancer patient. You know there’s something inside your system.. its slowly eating up your existence, you’re trying to nullify its effect in your system.. you take drugs and undergo chemotherapy… but you know you’re going to die and there ain’t nothing you can do aba it….. I don’t have cancer and I don’t know what it feels to have it… or what the patient who actually has it undergoes through and what goes on in his mind…. I just know that I have my own form of cancer and its eating me away… and I can’t do anything aba it…. I’m jus waitin waitin… wat does it want? What is it aiming to do? What part of me is it goin to destroy??? Still waitin…..
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cold winter
November 21, 2011 | View Comments | Posted by momo
i so want to be alone right now .. for a while atleast .. or may be a month or so .. i wish i could hibernate for a while until the winter ends. I so hate winter season. It feels so cold and i feel so numb … i wish it wud end soon ..
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:’(
November 18, 2011 | View Comments | Posted by momo
Life can get so tricky sometimes … things that you aren’t expected happen … one day you believe in something and the other day you think it was not the right thing you said or believed .. one day you believe in destiny and things are happening because its destined to happend and the other day you don’t believe in destiny; you don’t believe in anything you’re ever seen or heard .. you are so confused that you don’t even know what you want .. all you want it to change whats happening; change what has happened;change the past .. you with you can make some editing in your past; you wish you cud have erased few things you’ve said , few things you’ve done .. you want to relive few moment that you know will never come again ..
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Forgettin.. n forgettin some more……
November 3, 2011 | View Comments | Posted by spaghetti
“He’s forgetful” doesn’t quite define him.. that’s an understatement. “He doesn’t remember anything” is more like it.. that’s what he is. He doesn’t remember anything. Well.. that would be an overstatement, I mean.. he does remember certain stuff I guess, but the ones that are important, to me or to him, he mostly forgets…. If I were writin this a couple’aa months back, then I’d be expressin my anger… but but but… down the line, I’ve begun to accept his ‘forgetfulness’… he really doesn’t remember stuff.
Now that I’ve built a general picture of him.. lemme get to the point. Today was our anniversary… I know this is a gal thing, most guys don’t remember and its totally okay. Also granted is the fact that I’ve already learnt to accept his lack of ‘brains’ (?) so ofcourse I don’t expect him to remember. Girls all around the world are known to drop subtle hints to their respective guys to let them know, in the subtlest way possible, that on the so n so date is their anniversary. And so, guys will just post a reminder on their cell phones.. on the last moment, they shop fo’ watevaa they see first, regardless of the color (don’t get me started on a guy’s perspective on colors. All he really likes is black)
So neways, I’m different. (or so I’d like to say 
) So I figured I wouldn’t the subtlest of hints or watevaa… my guy is more than forgetful.. if I tell him today, he WILL forget tomorrow and I don’t wanna drop the hint every other day until the main ‘anniversary’ day and realize that he has, infact, forgotten again! So I didn’t let him know, didn’t plan anything fo’ us either… neways we decided that we shud catch up in the evening after his office is over…
Before we caught up, onaa our mutual fren called me up and I told him how it was our anniversary. A minute or so later, my guy calls me up and tells me how he’s so happy to have me and ‘happy anniversary’ and all that…. I’m shocked!!! But ofcourse, I know it’s the ‘fren’ who told him. But why’d he tell him?? Well, apparently because my guy suckssssssss at rememberin, he’d asked his fren to remember the date fo’ him and apparently he suckssssss too and I reminded him!!! Geeezzzzzzzzzzz…….. talk aba subtle hints!!!!
Here’s to memory loss!
I am just me; nothing more, nothing less. This is my diary but I'm not the only writer. You can write on it too. Check how?
The human mind treats a new idea the way the body treats a strange protein; it rejects it.
